On-pitch life-saving? Check. Riot Police? Check. Eating contest? Check. Team of dwarf footballers? Check. Welcome to this week's Football Circus...
Kiev Midfielder Saves Rival's Life
Most teams will have the odd player that their fans consider a 'hero' - be it for their goalscoring prowess, loyalty to the club or perhaps their leadership qualities. This week though, fans of Dynamo Kiev fans can truly say they have a hero in their ranks in midfielder Jaba Kankava - and even fans of fierce rivals Dnipro would likely find it hard to disagree.
Kankava turned out for Kiev against Dnipro at the weekend and watched as his side's keeper Denys Boyko accidentally knocked Dnipro's captain Oleg Gusev out cold, as Boyko's knee clashed with Gusev's head. Quick to react, Kankava rushed to the scene like an action hero, putting his hand down Gusev's throat in order to clear his airways in case of him swallowing his tongue.
Gusev recovered after medics stretchered him off the pitch. The Kiev doctor confirmed:
"He sustained medium concussion, several bruises and a bruised jaw".
Despite Kankava's heroics, Dnipro ran out 2-0 winners.
Riot Police to Ref's Rescue in Copa Libertadores
Riot police are often called into action during South American football matches - a sad yet true fact. However their involvement is usually limited to separating rival sets of fans from each other. That was not the case last Thursday evening in the Copa Libertadores showdown between Ecuadorian side Independiente del Valle and Argentine outfit San Lorenzo, as the riot police were forced to shield the referee and his fellow assistants from incensed players.
Referee Carlos Amarilla controversially awarded Independiente a late penalty and by virtue, the opportunity to equalise in the 95th minute. They duly converted the penalty and it was subsequently followed by the full time whistle. Cue the San Lorenzo players descending upon Amarilla, furiously seeking to give him a piece of their collective minds.
Fully aware of how further chaos could unfold, the capable riot police swarmed onto the pitch and surrounded Amarilla and his fellow officials, fending them from the angry mob of players.
San Lorenzo midfielder Ignacio Piatti said of his team's reaction:
"We are very angry as during the match the referee whistled everything for them.
"Every time there was a close call, they got it".
The result meant San Lorenzo remain bottom of Group 2 of the Copa Libertadores, level on points with Independiente del Valle.
Cosmos Player Bites Off More than he can Chew in April Fool's Joke
So the New York Cosmos are finally back in existence...who knew? After three years of promotional hype including a friendly against Manchester United for Paul Scholes' testimonial when he first retired, the Cosmos returned to competitive action last year, taking their place in the second division of the North American Soccer League. They have made it known that they wish to join the MLS in the future. If their eating habits which were on show in this prank are anything to go by though, that won't be happening anytime soon...
The Cosmos released a video on their official website this week (April Fool's Day to be exact), featuring Peri Marosevic. Marosevic was the unwitting victim of an April Fool's prank which his club were behind. With the team eating out in 'Buffalo Wild Wings' restaurant in New York, Marosevic was lured into an eating contest with 'busboy Kevin'. Little did Marosevic realise that 'Kevin' was in fact Takeru Kobayashi, a man dubbed the "world's best competitive eater".
Marosevic could only look on in shock (partially due to his genuine surprise, partially due to the fact that he'd just downed 18 buffalo wings himself, we presume), as the greasy-fingered 'Kevin' devoured an astonishing 58 buffalo wings, before revealing himself to be the mighty (and peculiarly skinny) Kobayashi.
The Eleven Dwarfs
Here at Football Circus we strive to bring you the most entertaining football stories from around the world, week in, week out. Oftentimes it's a struggle to find a story that fits our, shall we say 'unusual' criteria. We've had animal pitch invaders, UFO sightings over football stadiums, even a prostitute-robbing footballer. We thought we'd seen it all. Until this week, when we discovered that Youtube channel Barcroft TV, have uploaded a mini (no pun intended) documentary, featuring Gigantes do Norte - a Brazilian football team made up entirely of dwarfs.
The team was formed in 2006 with the aim of fighting size prejudice in their home country. While they take on teams of taller stature, the team are permitted to get on each other's shoulders when defending free-kicks.
Their star striker is Casimero Ribeiro, AKA Wagner Love, so called for his dreadlocked resemblence to the former CSKA striker. Ribeiro told Barcroft TV:
"My life changed because at one point I was struggling to deal with the prejudice in the streets, but now I receive compliments, wonderful compliments when I play".
Amazingly, Gigantes do Norte ("Giants of the North") play on full size pitches, despite their smallest player standing at only 3ft 3in. They regularly draw crowds as large as 30,000.
What's Mad Mario Upto this Week?
It's been a relatively quiet week on the Balotelli front, all things considered. With Milan already out of the Champions League, Balotelli's most recent action came last weekend when he helped the Rossoneri to a 3-0 victory over Chievo. The match saw Kaka grab a brace in what was his 300th appearance for Milan. Balo could not hide his delight for his teammate, tweeting:
"Well done guys! Super Kaka! 300 appearances! Congratulations brother!".
He went on to tweet a photo of himself and Milan pal Robinho, both looking very happy indeed.
But there's always somebody to rain on Balotelli's parade and this week they came in the form of ex-Chelsea, Parma and Inter striker Hernan Crespo. Speaking to FCInterNews.it, the Argentine joined a growing list of former players in deriding Super Mario:
"There are three things needed to make a good.
"One is your legs, another is your heart and the last one is your head. Using all three, your talent can emerge.
"Balotelli is missing some ingredients, I would define it as wasted talent because his talent is enormous. He is maybe missing something in his head a little bit.
"Being a great champion doesn’t mean just scoring goals, but also what you say and do".
Italian Football Story of the Week
- Roma to retire Number 10 Jersey when Totti leaves
Roma president James Pallotta has suggested the club will retire the number 10 jersey when Francesco Totti finally decides to hang up his boots, as a mark of respect to a man who is already a club legend. With Roma flying high in second position in Serie A, Champions League football is all but guaranteed for the team from Italy's capital for next season and their form is down in no small part to Totti's impressive performances of late.
Questioned by Sky Sport 24 about Totti's hero status at Roma, Pallotta (who also owns the Boston Celtics), remarked:
"It would be great to be able to replicate players like him, De Rossi and Florenzi.
"In Boston we had Larry Bird, we had Paul Pierce, and it was very difficult to decide to sell him, but it was good for the team.
"I’d like to have players who are 10-15 years in the squad.
"When Francesco stops? We will retire the number 10 jersey, there is no doubt. His farewell won’t last just an hour either, it will be at least a month".
Totti's form has been so impressive of late that talk is rife in the Italian media that he could be in line for a recall to the Italian national squad in time for the World Cup.
Artist's Impression of the Week
- 'Dwarf Team defend Free Kick'
Football Recommendation of the Week
- Uruguay 2014 Home and Away Jerseys; With the World Cup just around the corner, sports shops worldwide will be cashing in on replica jersey sales. Of all we've seen so far, Uruguay's have really caught our eye. Maybe it's the simplicity or the non-garish approach that Puma have taken but we these are the pick of the bunch.
Non-Football Recommendation the Week
- Watch Dogs; "In Watch Dogs, enter the world of hacker Aiden Pearce who can use the high-tech city of Chicago as a weapon. Available on Xbox One, PlayStation 4, Xbox 360, Playstation 3 and Microsoft Windows". This goin' be good.
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