We have quite the star-filled Football Circus for you this week, with notorious criminal Charles Bronson and Stephen Hawking both featuring. Ronaldinho and Kevin Grosskreutz have also made it into this week's edition and both have proven in their own special way, that fame and wealth, more often than not, do not go hand in hand with dignity.
Gross! Dortmund Midfielder Relieves Himself in Public
Only weeks ago were we reporting on how a certain Kevin Grosskreutz was in trouble with the law after allegedly throwing a kebab in the face of a Cologne fan, while on a night out with teammate Julian Schieber. Well, it would seem Mr. Grosskreutz's crass behaviour is showing no signs of abating as he has this week hit the headlines for urinating in public.
German newspaper Bild has reported that following Dortmund's 2-0 defeat by Bayern Munich in the German cup final, Grosskreutz found it appropriate to have a few drinks afterwards. An unlucky defeat, season over, World Cup yet to come - all well and good. However Grosskreutz became so inebriated that onlookers saw him urinating in the lobby of Hotel Berlin at 6A.M. the next morning!
Grosskreutz had reportedly been out in 'Kraftwerk' nightclub prior to his antics. Thereafter, he became embroiled in an argument with a guest of the hotel and police were called to the scene - Grosskreutz had managed to disappear before their arrival though.
Grosskreutz has at least apologised for his actions, telling Bild am Sonntag:
"I was totally frustrated after the game.
"We had planned so much, we really wanted to win the cup. I had a blackout. I'm sorry".
National team manager Joachim Loew outlined that such behaviour would not be tolerated while Grosskreutz is on duty with the national squad:
"Oliver Bierhoff and had a serious talk with Kevin.
"National players are role models, on the pitch as well as off it. We reminded him of this and made it clear to him that such a thing should not happen again.
"Kevin is still young - he is impulsive, he has heart and passion. He shows it when he stands on the pitch. You must also see that Kevin has always behaved properly with the national team. This incident occurred with Borussia Dortmund and there the organisers have already responded".
Ronaldinho Renting out Home for World Cup
Travelling to Brazil this summer for the World Cup? Struggling to find accomodation? Well fear not, for Brazil legend Ronaldinho has decided to rent out his own house during the tournament...for a paltry €11,000 a night!
The former Barcelona man, who missed out on a place in the Brazil squad for the World Cup, has decided to take advantage of his nation's hosting of the competition and has listed his pad on Airbnb.com in the hope that some rich folk will cough up the hefty fee for his five bedroom mansion.
Referring to the house as '#CasaR10', he has listed the house to have:
"...sauna, spa pool, barbecue, home theatre, gourmet kitchen with balcony, cellar, special refrigerator for beer, fireplace, office, zen massage or yoga room, garage for 3 cars, and a unique stage to do a cool show with friends".
To prove he wants, sorry means, business, Ronnie has posted the following message on his official Twitter account:
"This is for anyone who is in doubt that I will rent my house on Airbnb! Enjoy".
Charles Bronson Wreaks Havoc after Arsenal FA Cup Victory
Tottenham fan and notorious criminal Charles Bronson, has this week, somewhat bizarraely, been making some football-related headlines. The Daily Mirror have published a letter which Bronson, apparently infuriated by Arsenal's FA Cup victory, sent to his friend and ex-wife of Ronnie Kray, Kate Kray. Covering himself in butter, Bronson attacked twelve prison officers at Full Sutton prison in York where he is an inmate, such was his rage at the Gunners' success.
The letter reads:
"Not good news. I’ve had another rumble. This time with a dozen riot mob on the yard!
"Obviously I had my reasons and I’d sooner swallow teeth than my pride. Sadly I came off worst – got smashed up ribs.
"Life goes on Kate! You won’t hear me moan!
"It was sunny! A scorcer! Arsenal was playing Hull. I so wanted Hull to win, coz I’m Spurs.
"I got Lurpak and spread it on thick. Then a small cloud appeared.
"I swear I see Ron’s face. It was eerie. Go on son, let ’em have it!”
"I know the mind plays games in moments of mad events but it is still a comforting thought Ron’s still around. Made me feel happy. Safe! Double up for it!".
Stephen Hawking Assesess England's World Cup Chances
Paddy Power have teamed up with Professor Stephen Hawking to assess Engerland's chances at this year's World Cup. Hawking would perhaps not be the first person who springs to mind when choosing someone to dissect and analyse a football team's past performances, but having watched his Paddy Power video, we'e scratching our heads in wonder as to why nobody ever thought to consult him before!
Professor Hawking has found that England play best at the World Cup when using a 4-3-3 formation, wear a red kit and have a referee from Europe in charge of their game as European refs are apparently more sympathetic towards the English style of play.
He also peruses over the best penalty techniques and concludes that shots struck with power into either the top left or right corner have the most chance of success. Lastly, he informs us that tall strikers are, unexplainably, better penalty takers. Roy Hodgson may yet live to regret leaving a certain Mr. Andy Carroll at home.
What's Mad Mario Upto this Week?
It's been a less controversy-laden week for Mr. Balotelli than usual this week. Busy training with Italy as part of their World Cup preparations, Balotelli has, for the most part, steered clear of scandal and headlines. With that said, Balotelli never really keeps his head fully down...though perhaps he should, as an alternative career as boxer may be in the pipeline if an Instagram video he released this week is anything to go by. Balo posted the video of himself sparring with a friend for reasons only Balotelli himself will know. The video ends with a clip of a goat headbutting a moped followed by a clip of (what looks like) Balo's brother sleeping. Naturally.
But the rather odd Instagram video was not the best Balotelli video we stumbled upon this week. No, that honour went to a video published by Puma this week - where Balotelli is interviewed by...himself. The innovative video is part of Puma's World Cup advertising and it proves to be quite entertaining, with Balotelli appearing to enjoy himself (both as interviewer and interviewee).
Cesare Prandelli meanwhile, has been speaking out against Balotelli's critics this week. The Italian national team boss told Mediaset:
"In terms of the national team, he has never behaved outside of the rules.
"He has played great games and he has a very high goal average.
"I rate him for what he has done and what he is doing in the Azzurri jersey.
"Mario knows that the World Cup can be the turning point in the life of a footballer.
"I hope that in these days of preparing he has realised that he will have to endure a lot of provocation.
"If he arrives prepared, he can do very well".
Italian Football Story of the Week
- Totti and Pirlo Going Nowhere
With Javier Zanetti, Ryan Giggs and Carles Puyol retiring recently, question marks have been raised as to whether two other stalwarts of the game will be hanging up their boots anytime soon - namely Andrea Pirlo and Francesco Totti.
Juve fans and football fans as a whole, will be relieved to hear that the former is rumoured at least, to be on the brink of penning a new two year contract with the Bianconeri. Though his international career will cease after this summer's World Cup, we can take solace in the fact that he will appear in next season's Champions League. The bearded one will be 37 when the rumoured two year deal expires.
Totti meanwhile has hinted that he will continue playing...for now at least. Speaking with GQ magazine, the 37 year old Roma captain stated:
"I grew up kicking a football and I will die doing the same thing".
"For sure, I will stay in the game – doing something, talking about football.
"But I’ll be the first person to throw in the towel as soon as I start making a fool out of myself".
Artist's Impression of the Week
- 'Toilet Evades Grosskreutz after Boozy Night'.
Football Recommendation of the Week
- ESPN World Cup Posters by Cristiano Siqueira; Well these are bloody stupendous. "ESPN commissioned Brazilian artist and graphic designer Cristiano Siqueira to create a series of uniquely designed images in celebration of the 2014 FIFA World Cup".
Non Football Recommendation of the Week
- Froch V Groves 2; A fight that your local box office channel will tell you is unmissable and 'the biggest British fight in history'. It may not be quite that, but it certainly should be a great watch all the same, especially if the first fight between this pair is anything to go by.
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