Thursday, 11 December 2014

The One about a Goat, Lightning, an Armed Robber and Japanese Rugby

Fitting into your lives as well as a fat, bearded old man fits down a chimney, Football Circus is here for yet another week. And while we don't come bearing gifts, we aim to bring you plenty of cheer while marking off a number of countries along the way. This week we'll inform you of: Pep Guardiola's Japanese rugby adventure; a Chilean criminal-cum-Alexis Sanchez lookalike; a goat on a pitchin Crete; a lighting strike in Peru; and Maradona's sleepy trip to Venezuela. Throw in your weekly Balotelli update and Italian Football Story of the Week and you're all set! (Also to the person who happened upon Football Circus last week by Google searching 'Tamara Pisnoli nude photo', shame on you. And welcome back).




Football Circus Clown Quote of the Week

"My eyebrows have curled up thinking about that".

- Lee Dixon on Liverpool's half time substitutions this week.


Pep's Turning Japanese...And to Rugby

Bayern Munich manager Pep Guardiola will undertake quite an unusual second job over the coming months - Working as an advisor for Japan's rugby team as they go into the 2015 Rugby World Cup in search of their first ever World Cup win.

The news was revealed this week and Japan's coach, Australian Eddie Jones, explained the decision to consult a man more familiar with spherical balls to Kyoto News:

"The main thing we learnt this year was that we have to be tactically more flexible. We need to react to situations on the field and make adjustments to the way we play.

"The soccer approach is called tactical periodisation, in which everything is done in preparation for the game and in order to be tactically aware.

"I watched Bayern train and had a really good meeting with the head coach and I really think we can improve greatly with adjustments in the way we train. He is the best soccer coach in the world and you always want to learn from the best.

"Rugby and soccer are very similar in that you always want to move the ball into space and Bayern Munich and his previous team Barcelona played the most fantastic passing game you have ever seen. The principles are exactly the same.

"The very best soccer teams vary their depth and formation in order to make the most of the space. So when you get the chance to learn from the best it’s a fantastic opportunity".

The last big name to switch between the two sports was Sir Clive Woodward who, despite having won the Rugby World Cup with England, failed miserably when he took the reigns at Southampton. Though Guardiola will have a far less involved role with the Japanese rugby team, he will certainly be hoping to fair better.


Alexis Sanchez Causing Havoc in the Streets of Chile

'Alexis Sanchez' was arrested this week in Chile. No, not the Arsenal winger, but his doppelganger, Daniel Jesús Brizuela González, who is nicknamed 'Alexis Sanchez' due to him bearing a striking resemblance to the Chile international.

González does not shy away from the comparison either and is often spotted wearing a Barcelona jersey with 'Alexis 9' on the back. The arrest was reportedly down to an armed robbery and the criminal has over forty arrests in the past three years for similar convictions.

Surely if he's getting caught so often he might thinking about changing his image?! Given the time of year it is, a certain pair of 'calling card' leaving crimnals spring to mind...





Goat on a Pitch

We've featured many animals here on Football Circus: Dogs; cats; cows; sheep; lions; a parrot; monkeys; snakes; and a rooster. But never a goat. Until now. Yes, a game in Crete between local sides Elounda and Ierapetra was interrupted by an unwelcome guest in the form of a goat.

The goat wandered onto the pitch on a number of occasions, even appearing to want to take over from the goalkeeper at one point. Much to the crowd's amusement, efforts to remove the goat were foiled time and time again until eventually, a fan who looked to be the owner or perhaps a shepherd, managed to grab the goat by the horns and escort him away.




What a Strike! Peruvian Player Hit by Lightning

Peruvian footballer Joao Contreras got more than he bargained for when he turned out for his side Sport Aguila this week. The 21 year old's side was 6-3 down from the first leg of an encounter with Fuerza Minera and he was intent on helping the team turn their fortunes around. However, Contreras got the shock of his life when, with the second leg level at 1-1, he was struck by lightning!

Unbelievably, Contreras was initially thought dead after being struck down. In fact Sport Aguila's official Twitter account went as far as to confirm so much. Miraculously Contreras, after being rushed to hospital following medical attention, survived the strike. Despite suffering second degree burns, he in now in a stable condition.

The lightning was so bad that the assistant referee was also struck, though he escaped unharmed and was merely treated for shock. The match was unsurprisingly suspended following the bout of lightning. Whether or not Contreras will tog out for the rematch is unconfirmed. Regardless, Joao Contreras, we salute you!



Maradona Doses off During Trip to Vene-ZZZuela

Diego Maradona did not cover himself in glory this week on a trip to Venezuela as he dosed off during a speech by Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro. The Argentine great had been invited as a special guest to celebrations of the 190th anniversary of the Battle of Ayacucho, a battle in which independence was won for both Peru and the rest of South America (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Ayacucho).
Clearly, Maradona was bored senseless by the speech and thought he'd use the opportunity to catch up on some shut eye. Embarrassingly, the Barcelona and Napoli legend was then presented to the audience as "a rebel and revolutionary". Cue rapturous applause from the crowd and television cameras panning to the World Cup winner...Who had his arms folded and eyes closed. Maradona had to be nudged forward by a friend and immediately got to his feet and waved (which we'd like to now imagine he does every time he wakes up).




What's Mad Mario Upto this Week?

It's been another rough week for Super Mario as his tumultuous spell at Liverpool continues. Missing out on involvement in their 0-0 draw with Sunderland and the weekend and their 1-1 match with Basel later in the week through injury, clouds still hang over the striker's future. With the Anfield club now out of the Champions League and squad depth looking less important, Daniel Sturridge's eventual return from injury could be mean curtains for Balo's time at Liverpool.

Indeed, his manager's words to the press about him this week were less than encouraging and even suggested that Balo is the team's third choice striker. Speaking to the media, Brendan Rodgers said:

"As as a club we felt that buying Mario was the solution at the time.

"In the summer, we had Rickie Lambert. Fabio Borini looked 100 per cent that he was leaving, and obviously Daniel Sturridge has shown in his career so far that he gets injuries.

"To go into the season with no-one else would have been very difficult for us. It would have been unfair to leave Rickie Lambert, as a 32-year-old, as the only other striker that we had.

"I felt it was a risk we needed to take with Mario because, as a group, we couldn't afford not to at that time. It was obviously late on and we needed to have someone in.

"It's something that we can't regret now. I made it clear at the beginning it was a calculated risk - and that is why he probably cost the money he did".


Italian Football Story of the Week

- AC Milan New Stadium expected for 2020

AC Milan CEO Barbara Berlusconi has informed reporters that the club's new stadium should be ready by 2020. Speaking at the club's sponsor day, the 30 year old daughter of Italian prime minister and club president Silvio Berlusconi, detailed the plans for the new ground:

"The work on the stadium continues and the plastic model is almost ready.

"We are awaiting a response in the first six months of 2015. The idea is to complete the stadium by 2020. This is my dream for the Rossoneri fans.

The area of the city this new stadium will be built in has not formally been chosen, but is believed to be near the new Casa Milan headquarters.

"Right now we are evaluating the area that will be fully functional for the needs of a club like ours. Even my father, who is very fond of San Siro, is enthusiastic about the project.

"There are no financial problems with the stadium, as there are many companies interested in this project.

"Milan Lab will be restructured and in April-May we will begin a commercial project regarding Milan Lab".

The move to the 50,000 seat stadium will see AC Milan part company from Inter Milan, with whom they currently share the 80,018 capacity San Siro. Many AC fans are unhappy with the move as the San Siro, which was built in 1926, was originally owned occupied by their team until Inter began ground sharing in 1947. The new stadium's location is expected to be close to club headquarters, 'Casa Milan'.


Artist's Impression of the Week

'The Game's Up!'; Criminal who poses as footballer is finally arrested.



Football Recommendation of the Week

- Personalised Football Books; A collection of newspaper headlines about the team of your choosing from throughout history. Not a bad Christmas gift idea we must say.




Non-Football Recommendation of the Week

- California Dreaming (Bobby Womack); Who does the best version of California Dreaming? The Mamas and the Papas? The Beach Boys? Brotherhood? If you answered with any of these you're wrong. The correct answer is Bobby Womack. Why are we only recommending a song this week, especially when it's Christmas and we must be spoiled for choice for non-football recommendations? Listen to the song and thank us later. It's bloody brilliant.



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