Welcome one and all to the 75th edition of Football Circus. From our humble beginnings back in 2013, we've somehow managed to churn out 75 editions of the blog. We certainly don't plan on stopping anytime soon either. So, instead of patting ourselves on our backs and farting around, we shall move onto this week's edition. What's in store for your 75th Football Circus? Bart Simpon? Check. Lederhosen? Obviously. A possible leg amputation? Sure. The Pope? But of course! So get stuck in...
Football Circus Clown Quote of the Week
“If he’d done that, no one would have batted an eyebrow".
- Phil Thompson
Batistuta Wanted Legs Cut Off!
Legendary Argentine striker Gabriel Batistuta has revealed that following his retirement from the game in 2005, his legs were causing him so much agony that he took the drastic step of asking his doctor to cut them off! 'Batigol' scored 305 career goals, winning 78 caps for his native Argentina and turned out for Fiorentina, Roma and Inter Milan. However the years of playing took their toll on his legs and resulted in the former striker seeking medical help from a specialist in 2011.
Speaking to TyC Sports, Batistuta said:
"I left football and overnight I couldn’t walk.
"I wet the bed even though the bathroom was only three meters away. It was 4am and I knew if I stood my ankle would kill me.
"I went to see Dr. Avanzi and told him to cut off my legs. He looked at me and told me I was crazy.
"I couldn’t bare it any longer. I can’t put in to words just how bad the pain was. I looked at Oscar Pistorius and said that’s my solution".
The specialist instead told Batistuta that he could instead have screws put into one of his legs, which would help ease the pain. He continued:
"I chose the right leg, the doctor couldn’t do both.
"I didn’t care. My problem is that I have no cartilage or tendons. My 86 kilos are supported by bones alone. That’s what generated the pain.
"I’m much better now than I was three years ago".
Lederhosen Time Again for Bayern
Last year (in our 'Dirty 30' edition in fact - a whole 45 blogs ago...phew!), we revelled in highlighting Bayern Munich's Oktoberfest antics to you. We indulged in a wry chuckle as, the then newly appointed Pep Guardiola, donned lederhosen from the first time (to our knowledge at least). Well, it's that time of year again. And this year, we find ourselves laughing at the Bayern squad, including new signings, messrs Pepe Reina, Xabi Alonso, Mehdi Benatia and Robert Lewandowski.
The quartet, and indeed the whole team,were photographed wearing checkered shirts and ridiculous shorts as part of Bayern's yearly pre-Oktoberfest Paulaner promotions. The photos have been doing the rounds on Twitter and Instagram and are sure to sure to lead to phonecalls to the players from modelling agencies across Europe!
Zenit Sign Bart Simpson
Yes, you read it right. It's surely one of weirder headlines to date and we've certainly had a few. It's all true though, Zenit St. Petersburg announced that they had signed none other than Bart Simpson on transfer deadline day. The Russian club have decided that their traditional lion mascot will be joined by Bart Simpson this season in cheering on the team. Zenit claim to have "reached and agreement" with 20th Century Fox and released the following 'statement' on the deal:
"FC Zenit and the 20th Century Fox have reached an agreement about Bart Simpson’s transfer to the Blue-White-Sky Blues! The latest addition to the team has already arrived in St. Petersburg, passed his physical, signed his contract and had his first training session this morning with the rest of the team.
"Bartholomew Jo Jo (Bart) Simpson first appeared onscreen in 1987 and because of this he has decided to take 87 as his number.
"The latest addition to the mascot squad is expected soon make his debut at Petrovksy with our lion".
The bizarre move was accompanied by an even stranger video on the club's Youtube channel which showed Bart arriving at the airport, having a medical, signing for the club and meeting the team for the first time.
Zanetti and Pope Combine to put on Rome Charity Game...Wenger Referees!
Pope Francis is no stranger to Football Circus, having featured in a number of previous editions. His love for football extends so far that he last year got together with former Inter captain and fellow Argentine, Javier Zanetti, to come up with the idea of an inter-faith charity match for peace. The match took place on Monday at Rome's Olympic Stadium.
Former players and legends including Diego Maradona, Roberto Baggio, Carlos Valderama, Zinedine Zidane and Andrei Shevchenko were joined by current stars including Lionel Messi, Alessandro Del Piero, Ronaldinho and Andrea Pirlo. Pope Francis hoped the match would result in increased dialogue between those of different faiths, with a particular focus on the Gaza conflict.
One surprise guest present at the match was Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger. The Frenchman was spotted at Heathrow airport on the morning prior to the match, which coincided with transfer deadline day. His sighting sparked a host of rumours among Arsenal fans that Wenger was travelling to the continent to tie up a transfer deal. Much to the chagrin on many Gunners, Wenger was in fact off to referee the Pope's charity game. Arsenal did however tie up a late deal for Danny Welbeck in Wenger's absence, while the Pope's side lost out 6-3 to Zanetti's team.
What's Mad Mario Upto this Week?
Another week, another Football Circus and another big week for Mario Balotelli. Super Mario made his Liverpool debut in an impressive 3-0 victory for the side over Tottenham. The Reds were rampant against Spurs and were helped in no small part by Balo. Despite failing to get on the scoresheet, the striker put in a good performance and was lauded by fans and the media alike. He brought a lot of energy to the Liverpool team, complimenting the likes of Daniel Sturridge and Raheem Sterling when Liverpool went forward.
The Liver Birds even debuted a new chant for Balo:
"Mario fantastico, Mario magnifico, ole ole, ole ole".
Just as the fans were impressed with Balo's performance, the man himself was equally as impressed with his reception. He posted a clip of the chant being sung on his Facebook page and commented:
"That's why You'll Never Walk Alone. What a great reception!!!
"Great win! Wonderful experience to play my first match in Liverpool FC shirt. Fans were fantastic.
"Congratulations to the captain for his record of scoring in 16 consecutive years. Forza Steven Gerrard. Amazing today".
Clearly settling into his new home quickly, Balo has been going to great lengths to immerse himself in local culture, posting the photoshopped image below to his Instagram account. We would be very impressed if we saw Balo rocking this hairstyle by the the end of the season.
Italian Football Story of the Week
- The Final Chapter? Del Piero Travels to India to Join Delhi Dynamos
Italy and Juventus legend Alessandro Del Piero this week revealed the latest, and perhaps final, destination of his footballing career - the Indian Premier League. Del Piero's future had remained a mystery following his exit from Sydney FC at the end of last season, with many believing the 39 year old striker would finally retire from the game after a glittering career. Del Piero had other ideas though and this week was announced as the marquee signing of Delhi Dynamos FC.
In a statement, Del Piero had the following to say of the move:
"It's really exciting to be coming to India and playing for the capital of the country. I am thoroughly looking forward to training with my teammates and work together with the coach and the club and I hope to encourage the people of Delhi to follow our games.
"My passion has always been to play good football and I think I can definitely identify with my team's philosophy of playing an attacking and attractive game. It is always amazing to visit new countries but I have a feeling India is going to be a really special part of my journey. See you soon, India".
Artist's Impression of the Week
- 'Balo and Co. Celebrate the 75th Football Circus'.
Football Recommendation of the Week
- Subbuteo; Not sure how this gem of a game hasn't been recommended yet...It's bloody brilliant!
Non Football Recommendation of the Week
- Hozier; This lad is making quite a name for himself at the moment and we can see why. Elevated into the spotlight after the release of 'Take Me to Church', Hozier has backed up his hype thus far.
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