As the tension rises in the lead up to yet another Premier League campaign we suggest you take a break from frantically refreshing the BBC or Sky Sports football pages in the hope of an announcement of a new signing for your team. Put down that newspaper which previews each team's season and predicts who will finish in the top four. And calm those twitching fingers that are making change after change to your fantasy football team. Just breathe for a moment and read Football Circus, where we will this week bring you news of cows on a pitch in Peru, stink bombs, scientists and a Maradona run in with the media...
Football Circus Clown Quote of the Week
“There were a couple of opportunities to stay here [in the Premier League] but I can’t imagine playing for anyone else after being 12 years at Chelsea. I’ve got a lot of respect for a lot of other Premier League clubs, particularly the top ones, but I'm not sure I could have done that".
- Frank Lampard, May 2013
"Joining up with Manchester City is a fantastic opportunity for me".
- Frank Lampard, August 2014
On the Head! Or Maybe Not...
The art of heading the ball has come in for criticism this week as scientists have suggested that heading a football may in fact be unsafe for children.
Sky News in the UK have this week being speaking with Dr. Michael Grey who is a reader of Neuroscience at the School of Sport, Exercise and Rehabilitation Sciences in the University of Birmingham. Dr. Grey has claimed that he and colleagues believe heading the ball is dangerous for children.
Dr. Grey has stated:
"The reason for that is two-fold. First, the neck muscles aren't yet developed for the size of the children's head at that age.
"The other reason is that their brains are still developing so they're still in a very vulnerable period for taking a blow to the head, and I should say these concussive events, we don't yet know if repetitive injury such as this is safe for professionals either".
Next week, we'll look at the introduction of cotton wool kits being introduced at Under 12's level and below...
Maradona the Slapper
Diego Marodona has been called a number of names in his 53 years. A genius; a womaniser; the greatest player in history; a fat drug addict. Though he has not, until now, been called a slapper. He added that particular title to his collection this week, as he was filmed slapping a journalist in his home country of Argentina.
Maradona was filmed in his car by numerous reporters leaving a theatre in Buenos Aires. Also in the car were his son Diego Fernando and one of Maradona's baby mommas (Diego Fernando's mother unsurprisingly) and ex-wife, Veronica Ojeda. Ojeda was in the passenger seat at the time and while Maradona casually fielded journalist's questions through the open car window, Ojeda was allegedly *shock horror* WINKED AT by one of the journalists.
The journalist's twitchy eye lead to Maradona angrily exiting the vehicle, calling the man in question an "idiot", then slapping him across the face.
Exclaimed the decorated former striker:
"Why mess with my wife if I do not mess with you?".
Why indeed Mr. Journo. Why indeed.
Pique Has a Stinker
27 year old grown man with a beard, Gerard Pique, is in trouble this week for his behaviour on a Barcelona team flight to Helsinki ahead of a pre-season friendly with HJK. Pique, according to Spanish newspaper Sport, let off a stink bomb at the rear of the plane that Barca travelled on.
The smell was so foul that the Spanish defender infuriated cabin crew and was forced by club staff to apologise to them, after the cabin crew themselves had to apologise to other passengers on the flight. Teammates were equally upset by Pique's childish actions, though were perhaps not as surprised as the cabin crew, as Pique has form for pranking.
He has previously:
- Thrown sunflower seeds at the team bus
- Bizarrely prematurely informed journalists of the birth of his and partner Shakira's son
- Along with Lionel Messi, burned a club staff member's moped
- Along with Lionel Messi, burned a club staff member's moped
Any hopes of Pique maturing since Carles Puyol's departure from Barcelona seem to be hopeless however in light of his latest stunt.
Load of Bull! Cows Removed from Peruvian Pitch
This week saw the meeting of club sides Minsa FBC and Transporte Inambari of Mazuko in the Peruvian Cup, but the match was interrupted by some visitors of the bovine variety. Of course, the events were captured on camera and can now be seen on Youtube.
The herd of cows were seemingly undeterred, or unmooooved if you will, by the players running around the pitch at full pace and a football being kicked around. They casually made their collective way onto the pitch, with two of them even locking horns at one point, oblivious to the fact that a match was taking place.
Their presence was fleeting however and almost as soon as they had arrived, they were making their way home, possibly unimpressed with the reaction they had received from the fans.
What's Mad Mario Upto this Week?
It's birthday week this week for Balotelli, with the striker having turned 24 on Tuesday. He took to Instagram to both thank fans for their birthday wishes and record his birthday exploits, which involved him talking on his phone whilst riding a Segway around a hotel.
Balo wasn't the only one celebrating his birthday. His club A.C. Milan chose to celebrate the great man by uploading a highlights video on their official Youtube channel, paying tribute to the frontman.
Super Mario's teammate Nigel de Jong who also played along side him at Manchester City, followed suit by tweeting Balo a birthday message:
"Congratulations on your 24th birthday Mario. Becoming an adult, act now".
The tweet appears to have been tongue in cheek but new Milan manager Pippo Inzaghi will certainly hope he sees a mature trouble-free Balotelli going into the 2014-15 season. Tuttosport this week reports that despite countless reports linking the striker with a move away from the San Siro this summer, Milan have now reluctantly accepted that they will be unable to offload the Italian international, and have now settled on holding onto the striker for the next season at least.
Italian Football Story of the Week
- Tavecchio Voted FIGC President
Two weeks ago we reported on the possibility of Carlo Tavechio, who had racist and sexist comments attributed to him, being elected as president of the FIGC (Italian F.A.). Truthfully, given the media storm that went with Tavecchio's comments, we did not believe there was genuine chance he would be voted in. Well, this is Italian football and Tavechio has been elected president. The 71 year old defeated rival Demetrio Albertini who to our knowledge, is not a racist nor a sexist , take the title of president.
Already though confidence must surely be restored in fans of the Italian game, as former president Franco Carraro has come out with the following comments on Tavecchio's election:
"He is not the ideal President for Italian football.
"And I do not deny that his shortcomings are obvious, he does not speak well, of course, yet he is the man of this moment, the best possible option.
"And Demetrio Albertini? He made an incredible speech on medals and merit, but I wonder where has he been for the past eight years?
"Was it perhaps another Albertini who drove out Claudio Gentile from the Italy Under-21 team, and winner of an Olympic bronze medal, to appoint his friend Pierluigi Casiraghi?".
Oh well that's alright then.
Artist's Impression of the Week
- 'Pique Stink Bomb Goes Down Badly'.
Football Recommendation of the Week
- Sky Sports 5 / John Myatt; They're dubbing it "Your new home of European football" but quite how true that is remains to be seen. Though it lacks Serie A, Ligue 1 and the Bundesliga, Sky Sports' new European football channel does boast the Champions League, La Liga, the Eredivisie and Euro 2016 qualifiers. We're more impressed however with these John Myatt pieces which were released as part of Sky's promotion.
Non-Football Recommendation of the Week
- 'Ceannt Fort' (Wicker Bones); Ceannt Fort is the latest single from Dublin band Wicker Bones and is well worth a listen. Really great piece of music. "Ceannt Fort is the name of a picturesque housing estate in Dublin city beside St. James' Hospital. It was written by Bryan Dunphy whose mother grew up in the area and combines nostalgic imagery with the perceived timelessness of the place. The instrumental arrangement was written by Dylan Curran".
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Cheers for the kind words friends- Dylan aus Wicker Bones
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