It's been a tough two days with no World Cup matches to be seen. Fear not though as your latest Football Circus is here to fill that football shaped void in your heart. The Dutch are taking to the air this week, while a certain pre World Cup prediction we made has become reality. Paddy Kenny finds himself in a spot of bother in our very loose Italian Football Story of the Week and Balo's future is again making headlines...
Football Circus Clown Quote of the Week
"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer".
- David Acfield.
The Sky's Not the Limit for Dutch Squad with Space Trip Promise
The Netherlands have been in impressive form this World Cup, already progressing to the Quarter Finals of the competition and trouncing current champions Spain 5-1 along the way. And if the incentive of lifting the World Cup trophy was not in itself enough for them, Dutch aerospace engineering company, Ruimtevaartbedrijf SXC, have promised they will send the team into space!
Ruimtevaartbedrijf SXC co-founder Michiel Mol told the NL Times:
"As a company of Dutch origin, we are mega proud of the achievements of Oranje in Brazil. An unearthly performance deserves an unearthly reward!
"We are going to try to take the players literally to a higher level – 103 km!
"We'll take the whole selection of 23 players and of course, Louis van Gaal".
Tiny Tears At It Again
Brazil goalkeeper Julio Cesar has garnered a bit a reputation for bursting into tears at the drop of a hat and was even featured on Football Circus recently for his tearful goodbye speech to Toronto FC, having played a mere seven matches for them. So it hasn't come as a massive surprise to us that after Brazil's penalty shoot out victory over Chile, Cesar began to cry, yet again, during an interview.
Cesar had the following to say during the interview with a Brazilian television channel:
Cesar had the following to say during the interview with a Brazilian television channel:
"Four years ago, I gave a very emotional interview.
"I’m repeating that again today with you, but this time I’m emotional with happiness.
"Only God and my family knows what I’ve went through and continue to go through for today. All I know is that my story with the team isn’t over.
"My teammates are giving me a lot of encouragement to get to a better place.
"There are only 3 left.
"I expect to give you another interview like this, with happiness, with all of Brazil celebrating. This is my big dream".
Well, well, well. Looks like that's one Football Circus pre-World Cup prediction proven right at least!
FIFA 15 Ad Heralds Visible Player Breathing and Hair Movement
With a release date set for late September (North America. 25 September Europe. 26 September UK and Ireland), advertising has begun in earnest for EA Sports' FIFA 15. Two videos are already viewable on the FIFA 15 Youtube channel. The first video is narrated by actor Idris Elba, famous for his roles in The Wire, Luther and Mandela: The Walk to Freedom, and Luis 'Gnasher' Suarez features quite prominently, as do Barcelona (do EA Sports know something we don't...hmm).
The second video highlights improvements in the latest edition of the game over previous efforts. The video hypes a "much more natural environment and a true to life look" which is achieved by "visual breathing and hair movement". Just what all football fans will want when getting a few games of FIFA in before a night out - noticing players breathing and their hair flowing in the wind.
Whatever happened to the days when we'd be dazzled by the coin toss at the start of a FIFA match and you could run away from the referee before getting booked?
Flying Dutch Fail to Impress Mexican Actor
Most of the Netherlands' population were overjoyed by their country's narrow victory over Mexico in the World Cup, however national airline KLM may have taken things a step too far. The cheeky scamps tweeted a picture of a departures gate, with the caption "Adios Amigos! #NEDMEX". All very tongue in cheek, but one Mexican was particularly unimpressed by the airline's apparent jovialty.
Actor Gael Garcia Bernal expressed his, shall we say, annoyance, with the following tweet:
"I’m never flying your sh***y airline again. F--- you big time".
KLM's attempt at a joke clearly went down like a lead balloon with Mexicans. After Bernal's tweet went viral, the airline were forced into an apology.
Spokeswoman for KLM Marnix Lisette Ebeling Koning said:
"It was meant to be a joke.
"But there was too much negative reaction".
Director General of KLM North America Marnix Fruitema added:
"In the best of sportsmanship, we offer our heartfelt apologies to those who have been offended by the comment".
What's Mad Mario Upto this Week?
Balo has not been doing too much this week, certainly nothing to cause a stir, but that has not detracted from his name making almost as many headlines as usual, with rumours of a move from AC Milan gathering pace by the day. A transfer to Arsenal seems less likely than it did last week, with various media outlets reporting that it is not a deal that either party are keen on. However there is talk that he may make a move to Liverpool should Luis Suarez leave Anfield and, in what would surely be one of the biggest shocks of the summer were it to come to fruition, he has also been linked with a move to Juventus.
Thought Milan apparently want rid of Super Mario, they may not be enthused about sanctioning business with Serie A rivals Juventus. There is a twist in the tale though...Tuttosport claim that Balotelli's agent Mino Raiola, with the aid of a financial institution, could buy Balotelli's contract, allowing him to move freely to any club he chose. Given Balo's already somewhat tarnished (be it justified or not) reputation in his homeland, there is a chance that neither Balotelli nor Juventus would want the move to go through.
Meanwhile, director of the Portobello Safari (the hotel where the Italian team stayed for the World Cup), Nino Guaragna, has claimed that Balotelli and teammate Antonio Cassano, were detached from the rest of the squad during their stay. Speaking to calciomercato.it (and probably getting a nice wad of cash for it for that matter), Guaragna claimed:
"Everyone in the staff agreed there was a lack of World Cup spirit. Maybe it would’ve been different without the families, as they could’ve been in a different hotel.
"I saw Balotelli and Cassano detached from the rest of the squad. It was obvious. Buffon, Pirlo and De Rossi were very likeable and nice with us. Buffon was the nicest.
"There was all the calm in the world here, but without that unity you aren’t going to win a World Cup.
"Cassano was out of control. The cleaning lady went up there to clean the room, which is necessary, and he shouted in her face. He’s not normal in the head".
Finally, Balo's Facebook followers reached the 7.5 million mark this week. He posted a video along with the following message to thank them:
"7.5 Million. U guys are amazing. Thank you".
Italian Football Story of the Week
- 17 Again? No Thanks says Leeds Chairman
We may be pushing our self-imposed strict boundaries for what classifies as an 'Italian football' story here, but we hope you'll forgive us, as we thought this one was too good not to report on.
Leeds United's Italian (there's the Italian bit) chairman, Massimo Cellino, has this week informed coaching staff and management that goalkeeper Paddy Kenny is not to play for the team any longer - as his birthday falls on the 17th of a month.
Cellino is alleged to have such a hatred of the number that not only has Kenny been dropped from Leed's pre-season tour squad, but he has changed seat number 17 at Elland Road to seat number 16b and wants the number 17 squad number retired. His disdain for the number 17 (which according to Hackers' Jargon File is the least random number - always a school day here at Football Circus), apparently stems from his time served as chairman of Cagliari where he claimed the team lost every game they played on the 17th of a month.
The superstitious Cellino, who was arrested in 2013 for attempted embezzlement and fraudulent misrepresentation while he was Cagliari chairman, is also reported to have a severe dislike of the colour purple. He has imposed a ban of the colour purple at Elland Road.
In some other Cellino-related trivia, in May of this year he played lead guitar for the Pigeon Detectives during their rendition of 'Hey Joe' at the Leeds end of season awards.
We're not sure just yet but we think we like this guy.
World Cup Fantasy Football Team and Predictions
- Football Circus World Cup 2014 Fantasy Football Team
Having completely forgotten to make any changes for the round of the last 16, Football Circus' team now lies 643697th out of 663280 competitors. To make matters worse, only Julio Cesar, Kevin Grosskreutz, Paul Pogba and Javier Mascherano remain from our original squad. So, for the quarter finals, semi finals and final, our aim to achieve at least one red card (hence the drafting in of Matuidi), one own goal and zero goals from our frontline. All of a sudden we're feeling confident again!
- Football Circus 10 World Cup Predictions
Once again, a recap of our 10 pre World Cup predictions:
1. Italy to progress to at least the quarter-finals with Mario Balotelli scoring at least two goals along the way
2. Kevin Grosskreutz to do something stupid
3. The Dutch squad to have a massive falling out
4. The French squad to have a massive falling out
5. Wayne Rooney to be pants
6. Cristiano Ronaldo to finally make an impact at the World Cup
7. Javier Mascherano to be sent off
8. Spain to relinquish their crown as champions
9. At least one team to blame poor performance on the heat
10. Julio Cesar to cry
2. Kevin Grosskreutz to do something stupid
3. The Dutch squad to have a massive falling out
4. The French squad to have a massive falling out
5. Wayne Rooney to be pants
6. Cristiano Ronaldo to finally make an impact at the World Cup
7. Javier Mascherano to be sent off
8. Spain to relinquish their crown as champions
9. At least one team to blame poor performance on the heat
10. Julio Cesar to cry
It's basically as you were from last week, with our confidence that predictions 2,3,4 and 7 will occur diminishing by the day. Predictions 1 and 6 are now categorically wrong. We've already announced we're taking half a point on prediction 5 and have been proven correct on number 8 and thanks to Julio Cesar being an emotional wreck of a man, number 10. Which scores us at 2.5 out of 10 to date. Oh dear.
Artist's Impression of the Week
- 'Behind the Tears'; Julio Cesar's Sadness Revealed
Football Recommendation of the Week
- Beards of Brazil (BT Sport); We're only too aware how most of you are screaming out for a handy guide to the all the beards on show at this year's World Cup. Well fret no more, because BT Sport have compiled this beaut.
Non-Football Recommendation of the Week
- How Different Animals Eat Their Food; Extremely informative* Youtube video about, well, how animals eat their food. *This may or may not be true.
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