All revved up for another Football Circus? This week we have some motor related stories with Robert Lewandowski and Valon Behrami falling victim to car obsessed criminals. We also report on the now driven individual that is Adriano and some Scientology, gender testing and headbutting stories thrown in for good measure. And of course our weekly dose of Mario Balotelli. So start your engines, because Football Circus has rolled into town once again...
Player Takes on Dugout
A bizarre video of an amateur Italian game has leaked onto Youtube this week. Nothing of particular note, other than a player scoring a goal, running to the sideline, headbutting the dugout and going through the glass, then getting sent off. As you do.
The video shows a Riolo Terme scrambling the ball over the goalline of opposition side Ponticelli. Ecstatic with his effort, the player rushed over to the subs bench and inexplicably headbutted the glass / hard plastic duggout, which shattered on impact. After diving through the gap he so carefully crafted with his noggin, he composed himself and ran back to the pitch to continue the match. Only the referee was none too happy with his celebrations and immediately produced a red card, turning the Riolo Terme number nine's joy into misery within seconds.
Adidas Ban Bayern Player from Scientology Practice
German magazine Der Spiegel this week managed to get their hands on a contract between Adidas and a Bayern Munich player, who apparently signed up with the brand in 2008. While the majority of the terms listed on the contract are relatively standard, one particular term caught the eye.
The contract outlined that drug possession, use or trafficking was forbidden, that the player could not wear the apparel of a rival brand and that the player must fulfil six PR duties a year. The practice of Scientology was also banned and it was noted that Adidas would cancel the contract if the player "belonged to any organisation or association which represents the principles of L. Ron Hubbard".
Der Spiegel subsequently obtained a quote from Adidas on the issue. The German sporting brand clarified:
"Scientology and other such unconstitutional organizations are incompatible (with the Adidas brand)".
Dortmund Fans not Tyred of Lewandowski Abuse
Robert Lewandowski has been subject to a fair amount of abuse from Borussia Dortmund fans since his imminent summer move to Bayern Munich was announced, and their ire at his betrayal shows no signs of abating. After recently being accused by a 17 year Dortmund fan of assault (an accusal which was later withdrawn), the Pole has this week had all four tyres of his Porsche Cayenne GTS stolen and the car itself put on cinderblocks.
The crime has not been proven to have been committed by Dortmund fans, though police will likely have them high on their list of suspects. The four tyres will cost poor Lewy €2,500 to replace. Somehow we think his new Bayern contract might cover the damage.
Gender Tests for Iranian Female Footballers
Gender testing in football has never been a massive cause for concern in the past, but women's football in Iran has this week come under the radar as the Iranian football federation revealed that four of their women's national team players were in fact, not female (or at least had not completed sex changes).
Random gender tests are now to be introduced in the country as it seeks to clamp down on men posing as women in order to forge careers in women's football.
Chairman of the medical committee of the country's football federation, Ahmad Hashemian, has been quoted in IRNA news agency as saying:
"If these people can solve their problems through surgery and be in a position to receive the necessary medical qualifications then their participation in women's soccer clubs will be permitted".
The controversy has already led to several women's league matches being suspended in the country.
Not So Sadriano
Back in March last year, Football Circus reported on 'Sadriano', the misfortunes of former Brazil international Adriano. Back then, Chinese league side Qingdao Jonoon had surpassed the opportunity to sign the striker, deeming him too unfit. In fact Adriano has not played a competitive match since he was at Corinthians in 2012 (he subsequently signed for Flamengo but did not turn out for them).
All is not lost though for the former Inter Milan man. Despite having a reputation for being a party animal, Adriano looks to have left that lifestyle behind him and has won himself a deal with Brazilian outfit Atletico Paranaense.
Adriano had been training with Paranaense since December, with the goal of regaining fitness and he has impressed coaches so much that they have rewarded him a one year contract. The deal was signed on Tuesday and will mean that Adriano can take part in the Copa Libertadores with his new side.
Speaking of the deal, Adriano told the club's official website:
"I'm very happy to sign the contract with Atletico Paranaense.
"It's very gratifying, especially after so much hard work and dedication during this period that I practiced with the team. Today I'm getting an opportunity to return to football with Atletico".
He went on to outline his excitement at the opportunity of playing in the Copa Libertadores:
"It's the only title that I haven't won and I want to help Atletico win it".
The team tweeted the following photo of Adriano signing his contract:
What's Mad Mario Upto this Week?
We should perhaps this week have renamed this segment "What's Up with Mad Mario this Week?". Balo was this week subbed off during Milan's 3-1 defeat against Napoli at the weekend and as he walked off the pitched in the 73rd minute, the striker was caught on camera crying. His reasons for doing so are as yet, to be confirmed. For he has not spoken out about the matter, nor does there appear to have been any incident that took place during the match to give rise to his, well, sobbing.
Rumours of racists chants during the game seem to be unfounded and Napoli themselves issued a statement noting that as far as they were aware "there were no racist chants against him, just as there were no racist chants at the Stadio San Paolo against anyone".
Manager Clarence Seedorf when questioned about Super Mario's tearful exit from the game, seemed none the wiser:
"There are moments when emotions like this can express themselves. It's not the first time that I've seen a player cry. It happened to me plenty of times too".
Suggestions have been made however, that Mario was overwhelmed given events in his life which preceded the match. As we last week reported, Balotelli had tweeted that DNA results had proven that he is now a father. Naples, the very city where the match was taking place, is the home city of Raffaella Fico, Balo's ex-girlfriend and mother of his now confirmed daughter Pia.
Italian Foobtall Story of the Week
- Behrami Driven Crazy after Car Theft
Napoli's Swiss midfielder Valon Behrami joined Robert Lewandowski this week as a victim of vehicular crime as he reported on Twitter that his car was stolen. Not quite as extravagent as Lewandowski's Porsche, Behrami had driven his smart car to the grocery store and on his return to the carpark found his precious motor had disappeared.
Not the first time Behrami had fallen victim to a theft, the player also had his Hublot watch stolen in December 2012. He tweeted:
"First the watch and now the car. I’m really ****ed off".
The car has since been recovered, but Behrami may still be smarting from the igominy of driving such a ridiculous ride.
Artist's Impression
"I'd Like to Report a Crime Officer" - Lewandowski reports his wheel theft.
Football Recommendation of the Week
- A Faraway Goal; Fascinating documentary about 23 year American Nick Pugliese, who has made a career for himself playing football in Afghanistan
Non Football Recommendation of the Week
- Jim'll Paint It; Possibly the oddest recommendation we've made to date, though it's originality cannot be disputed. The concept is simple. Send a request to Jim and he will paint it with MS Paint.
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